Most of us have seen that movie Runaway Bride with Julia Roberts where she runs from commitment because she doesn't know who she is without a man to assimilate herself to. I'm not saying that any of us are that bad, but after years of marriage and the addition of children, do we as individuals have much of a singular identity without our families and spouses?
After you become a wife and mother, is it hard to see yourself as anything else? Some of us have careers that give us a little identity away from our spouses, but what about those who do not?
If (heaven forbid) all of a sudden I was without my husband and children, what would I be? Who would I be? Well, I guess I would still be a graphic designer and a writer. I would still enjoy photography and fishing, but I would probably be a bit lost. Have I changed or assimilated at all since meeting and marrying my husband? Yes. Have I become dependent on him? Yes.
I think we all adapt to survive - just like the dinosaurs in Jurassic Park... "Life will find a way"! Mark has taught me to bust out of my shell and to speak my mind, and I like that freedom of communication (that you all are reaping the benefits of). My children have taught me to be more patient (even though I didn't think it possible to get more patient with the addition of children) and to value family.
Maybe it is a good thing that we have "become one" with our kids and spouses because it creates more harmony. Just don't lose your identity, and keep in mind that it's good to have your own hobbies and interests too - keeps things interesting, and it gives you something to talk about when and if you ever get that chance to go out on a date with your significant other!
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Cyndi M. Frick
This lifestyle blog is my outlet to share and advise about the things I love. I always have an opinion!